The very day I posted and asked about the burly Turkish bearish men from a Halls Candy commercial, a kind soul by the name of Michael emailed me screenshots from it!  Even though I was searching for a video, I was more than willing to repay him for his generosity.  Alas, he’s stubborn as a bull.  -_^  Seriously, friend, thank you very much!

To me, this Halls commercial is 30 seconds of pure homo fantasy.  Picture a dad skiing with his two kids.  Suddenly, he suffers from a runny nose and starts coughing, thus ruining his children’s vacation.  He then takes a Halls Candy (debatable if it’s truly a candy, but that argument is for a different blog).  The vapor action goodness of the candy’s menthol eucalyptus whisks our daddy away to a Turkish bath and ends up seating between two burly Turkish men wearing only a towel.  The burly men then educates the “little” dad how to inhale and exhale properly.  And if you watch closely, the dad is overtly ecstatic about the whole metaphor-thing-coming-to-life business.  His kids then disrupt him from his fantasy sequence as our daddy skis away with a big smirk on his face.

Well, okay, so it wasn’t all that homoerotic (plus I’m not sure if I had accurately remembered it), but you gotta admit that it’s a tad bit homo just by looking at the screenshots.  And, also, why was he wearing pajamas in a spa?  Note how his hands are clasped together while covering up, oh, I don’t know…  MORNING WOOD???!!!  Uh, yeah, sure…

I have no clue who they are; so I’ll hereby baptize the bearded, unibrow wonder
as Brian Blessed, while the other as Speed Racer’s dad, John Goodman.