Category Archives: Movies

“AIDAN 5”: Amazing Sci-Fi Film Noir Webseries

Wow, this is pretty awesome.  I just stumbled upon a new webseries called AIDAN 5.  What intrigued me was its premise (a detective trying to solve the murders of his clones) and its mashup of genres: pulp fiction, science-fiction, and film noir.  I’m sold!  And when I watched the trailer and its first episode, I quickly counted 4 woofy guys.  BONUS!  The protagonist may not be as husky as I would prefer, but he has a handsome face that reminds me of Drew Powell and Vincent D’Onofrio (whom I have criminally not posted about, though I once mentioned his similarity with Drew). [KEEP ON WOOFIN’!]

Shad Gaspard’s Twitter Fantasy Turned Reality: Auditioning For Chapel In “Youngblood”

Former WWE superstar, Shad Gaspard, just got an audition with Brett Ratner’s upcoming superhero movie, “Youngblood” via Twitter [Comic Book Movie].  I’ve never heard of “Youngblood” though I’m somewhat familiar with Chapel’s character from “Spawn.”  Body-wise, Shad definitely possesses the brawny muscles for the role. [KEEP ON WOOFIN’!]

Super Shirtless Saturday: Mark Henry In Red Speedos

The BearMythology look has been updated again by your finicky and oft-absent blogger.  Also, based on numerous suggestions, I will finally get with the 21st Century and start placing “Continue Reading” links on every post for easier reading consumption…

Anyway, my great friend, GE, sent me a link to a video that gave me a heart attack (I wonder how many heart attacks I’ve had during the course of this blog’s lifespan?): it is a video of pro-wrestler, Mark Henry, wearing only skimpy bright red speedos!  Seriously, why can’t he wrestle with this type of outfit?! [KEEP ON WOOFIN’!]

Will Sasso: “The Legend Of Awesomest Maximus”

Question: You have Will Sasso as your lead in a sword and sandal parody (such as “Gladiator,” “Troy,” and “300”).  Do you:

A) Make sure his wardrobe would be like the Spartans’?  (You know, revealing Will Sasso’s ever-so-sexy body.)

B) Make sure we get to see some full shirtless scenes?  (There’s always a sex scene in a sword and sandal film after all.)

C) Just show him partly shirtless.  (In the bear/chub world, that’s hardly being shirtless at all!)

Yup, you guessed correctly.  It’s “C.”  Will Sasso barely showed any skin in the film, National Lampoon’s The Legend Of Awesomest Maximus.  But, hey, I did not care at all because I was watching a film where Will Sasso was the freaking LEAD!  The movie was ridiculously stupid, lowbrow, and very offensive.  But, maybe it was because of Will Sasso, but I watched the darn thing about 4 times now and I’ll probably buy it on Blu-Ray too!  Also, I actually found myself laughing with the film and not at it!  What’s happening to my brain?

Anyway, would I have watched this if someone else who’s not as deliciously sexy as Will Sasso played Awesomest Maximus?…  Let me think for a sec– HELL NO!

So here are pretty much all of the scenes where Mr. Will Sasso teased us with some skin.

I know, I know.  This won’t cut it for some of you.  😛

So here’s a treat.  I’m an avid stalker visitor of Will Sasso’s blog @ HamFatter.com and there’s a cool entry there that pretty much reads like porn: Dog vs Bear.  Here is a snippet of such erotic fan-fiction…

Okay, Sasso walks at 6’3, 290lbs. His fighting weight is 260 maaaybe 250 but I don’t think so. The next time you’re with him I want you to make a careful study of his CALVES. Please understand their mass, vascularity and most importantly their positioning on the actual bone. Forget the perfect heart shape and the index finger sized arterial vein that branches and feeds the pulsing beast. Rather, look how high they sit. These are what we call “High Insertion Calves” in the bodybuilding world. Now why is this significant? Well, high insertion calves are almost always a very good indication of an abundance of fast twitch (red twitch) muscle fiber. Believe it or not, Will is mostly fast twitch. He’s made up of the kind of muscle one uses for explosive and powerful movements (see his high school football reputation and scouting history). You’ll rarely find a big man who can move as quickly or jump as high. Watch him dance around on his toes sometime. He makes you look like you’re underwater. The first thing a trainer would do with you, Chad, is work to get the lead out of them feet. You tend to plod. I know much of this may have to do with a general malaise but you’re still mostly made up of slower twitch fiber. You may have more endurance than the bald idiot and that’s a good thing.

I think I just fainted…  Santa Maria!  🙂

[Related Posts – Will Sasso]

Shirtless Saturday: Anthony Hayes (“The Square”)

The Edgerton Brothers’ “The Square” (Official Site) is one of my favorite films this year.  I’m not even sure if it was released in the US cinemas (as this was released on 2008), but I recently caught it on DVD and it’s spectacular filmmaking at its finest.  In a few words: “Australian film-noir set in the 1980s.”  And you know what?  It all worked fantastically.  As a lover of film-noir, the Edgerton Brothers did a superb job in creating a malicious world in a small Australian town.

With my fan-gushing out of the way, the film also starred a handsome actor that made my viewing even better: Anthony Hayes.  He’s a bit “smaller” for my tastes but his face, beard, furry chest, husky build, and — OMG! — that mullet!  The Mullet was a character of its own and I loved it.

And on to the good stuff.  It’s Shirtless Saturday, so here is the woofy Anthony Hayes in all of his shirtless and mulleted glory…

Goonday Moonday: Patrick Cox (Part 2 Of 2)

And we’re back with Part 2 of Goonday Moonday’s Patrick Cox…  (Part 1 is here.)

Check out the trailer for “The Good Guy” which appears to be a grindhouse-type of film.  And, I’m already sold!

And since I’m like obsessive-compulsive about better-quality photos/screenshots, here are the HD screenshots from the trailer:

Mr. Cox is obviously typecast as a killer, especially if you check out his IMDb resume.  However, check out these trailers of short & feature films displaying his dramatic range…


“Table 6” – Short film for which Patrick Cox speaks with an Irish accent


“The Book Of Noah” – Feature film that hasn’t been released

This photo is just so awesome! I love how he's just so "meh" about it.

Holy crap! Bull Hurley!!!!!

Production still from the unreleased "The Dead Shall Walk"
I renamed this photo to "Patrick Cox likes to cross his arms.jpg"

Finally, let’s end with this awesome illustration of Patrick Cox who has this affinity of crossing his arms — even in illustrations!

Okay, I lied…  Here’s a close-up of Patrick’s massive and beefy chest!  Aroooooooo!!!!!

[Related Posts – Patrick Cox]

Goonday Moonday: Patrick Cox (Part 1 Of 2)

For Goonday Moonday, I would like to present to you a wonderfully handsome big bearish fella named Patrick Cox.  I first uncovered him from Tumblr and I have to give a big shout out to randombearstuff for sharing this deliciously goony goodness with us.  Randombearstuff is a Tumblr blog, so expect NSFW stuff!  🙂

Patrick Cox just has that look that completely owns me.  He is thick, brutish, massive, and just downright gorgeous.  Dare I even say, “perfect”?  Yes, in fact, I will.  He’s just freaking PERFECT!

Before I even get to more of his photos and videos, I just need to share this thing about him.  On his Facebook he posted this image then commented on it.  For easy viewing, I have placed his comment on that image…

How can I not love this big cuddly bear?  Here’s a perfect example of a human being who’s not ashamed of his own sexuality and understands that gay people are no less different from straight folk.  Thank you, Mr. Cox.  Thank you.  And while we’re in the subject of  “gayness”…

I <3 U, PATRICK!!!

Check out his sizzle reel by Coleman O’Toole from Vimeo:

And, of course, with my very specific fetish, here are screenshots of a very specific scene from the sizzle reel…  😛

From the Tumblr images, it led me to one of his movies.  The following are the video and screenshots from the TV movie, “Ben 10: Alien Swarm”…  He had a short scene (though I must admit, I didn’t actually watch the flick just forwarded to his unfortunate way-too-brief scene).  The film seems pretty cool, so I’ll watch it when I get some time.


This video is also courtesy of Coleman O’Toole from Vimeo!
Apparently, I missed that beginning part!!!  (So there are 2 scenes total.)

Come on now... Who can resist such cuteness?

Here’s a webseries that’s currently working on getting financed called “Walkin’ In L.A.: A Comedy Web Series”:

[vodpod id=Video.4806875&w=425&h=350&fv=]

As this post has gotten way too long, let me take a break from all the hotness, and will continue with Part 2

[Related Posts – Patrick Cox]

Shirtless Saturday: David DeLuise In “Vampires Suck”

I try not to be a movie snob, but I can’t help it when movies like “Vampires Suck” do well financially while films such as “Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World,” “Kick-Ass,” and “Let Me In” do horrible business (just goes to prove that the popularity level of such geek-centric flicks are somewhat akin to gay-centric films).

Anyway, more often than not, these parody films will always include a jab or two at our larger and husky brethren.  Jareb Dauplaise, for example, was unfortunately poked fun of in both “Meet The Spartans” and “Epic Movie.”  But, hey, we got to see skin and no one is really twisting my arms to watch these abominations.  So just go ahead and continue to give us our bears and chubs in all of their natural glory.

With that superficial rant out of my system, here’s David DeLuise getting all shirtless in “Vampires Suck.”  In these screenshots, he revealed a physique molded by his dedication to “Mixed Martial Arts, Tae Bo, and Yogalates.”  Okay, so, um, maybe I kinda lol’ed at that.

And you know what?  I am definitely itching to watch just his scene on Blu-Ray…

[Related Posts – David DeLuise]
[Related Posts – Jareb Dauplaise]

Kevin Michael Richardson: The Bear With The Deep Bass Voice

I shared a clip of Cleveland Jr.’s rap battle with Kanye West from my Tumblr page, which then led me to the making of said rap battle in this video:

And the rest was history.  I discovered Mr. Kevin Michael Richardson and he’s definitely dreamy (at a quick glance, I thought he was James Monroe Iglehart).  And what caught my attention was his unbelievably sexy deep bass voice.  Check him out singing from the canceled show, “The Knights Of Prosperity” (I probably would have watched if I had known that he was in it):


His character’s name was Rockefeller Butts.

And check out his Wikipedia’s description of his work.  As an animation/gaming geek, this blurb is quite orgasmic:

Richardson has usually portrayed villainous characters due to his deep voice.

His credits include Captain Gantu from Lilo & Stitch, Goro in Mortal Kombat, the second voice of Skulker on Danny Phantom, Sarevok in the Baldur’s Gate series, Jolee Bindo in Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, Crunch Bandicoot in two of the Crash Bandicoot games, Tartarus from Halo 2, The Joker in The Batman, Ultimate Supreme Executive Chairman Drek in Ratchet & Clank, Antauri in Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!, Openly Gator from Queer Duck, Barney Rubblefrom modern-day animated series and movies based upon The Flintstones, Maurice the Aye-Aye from The Penguins of Madagascar, the unbeatable guardian of the time portal in Samurai Jack, and the voice of Exile in the late ’90s cartoon Road Rovers.

He often plays characters based on and satirizing comedian Bill Cosby, such as on Family Guy (with the voice of Jerome in the 7th episode of the 8th season) and The Boondocks. He also voices Cleveland Brown, Jr. and Lester Krinklesac in The Cleveland Show.

Finally, here are more woofy photos of Kevin Michael Richardson:

Welcome To BearMythology Version 3.0

Tyler Labine from Control Alt Delete

Hey there!  Long time, no post.  But it’s time to rectify that.  Life and other things took over which was why I was absent for quite a long time.  Life is still pretty hectic, but I will do my best to post as much as I can.

Sedrick Ellis, Defensive Tackle for New Orleans Saints

I’ve also changed the layout of this blog and hopefully you folks would like it…

Shirtless Saturday: Mikhail Porechenkov

Mikhail Porechenkov - Den D

I have never heard of Russian actor, Mikhail Porechenkov, before, then I saw this trailer for the scene-by-scene remake of Commando, titled Den ‘D.

Check out this side-by-side comparison with the original trailer for Commando.

Yes, the sculpted muscular body caught my eye, but it’s his rugged good looks that made me even more interested.  He completely reminds me of a stacked and built version of Ray Winstone (he would have made a perfect Beowulf).

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 01

A body like Arnold, with a Winstone face…

Mikhail Porechenkov 01

Here’s Mr. Porechenkov in all of his muscular shirtless glory…

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Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 16

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 02

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 03

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 05

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 10

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 11

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 12

Mikhail Porechenkov Den D 19

Finally, here are more images and screenshots of Mikhail Porechenkov, but this time he did not shave off his fantastic furry chest.  Why must huscular men like Porechenkov shave away those furry gifts from the gods?

Mikhail Porechenkov 02 censored
Had to censor the female's nipples. But if you MUST see them (and for the love of God, I'm not sure why), go ahead and click on the photo for the NSFW version. ಠ_ಠ

Mikhail Porechenkov 03a

Mikhail Porechenkov 03b

I truly love the following photo set.  Does anyone know where they’re from?  Also, for any Russian-speaking folks out there, may we please have further info on Mr. Mikhail Porechenkov?!  Pretty please?

Mikhail Porechenkov angel 01

Mikhail Porechenkov angel 02

Mikhail Porechenkov angel 03

These were my Google search keywords when I found the above photos.  I always quote my sources; but due to doing way too much work with the translation, I’ll use Google Search as my reference.  🙂

Михаил Пореченков
(Mikhail Porechenkov)

День Д
(Den ‘D)

Let’s end with the film’s DVD Making-Of Featurette (I’m guessing it is from the DVD)…

Paul Clemens: “The Horribly Slow Murderer With The Extremely Inefficient Weapon”

thsmwteiw

ChaserAlex submitted a very extended trailer that quickly became an instant favorite.  It’s Richard Gale‘s “The Horribly Slow Murderer With The Extremely Inefficient Weapon”…

Paul Clemens 21

I’m not sure if it’s a trailer for an even longer trailer or for a short film; but one thing is for sure, I definitely cannot wait to see this in its entirety.  This trailer is genius and writer/director Richard Gale really knew how to parody horror while at the same time respecting it.  That’s a tough act to juggle…

More importantly, our film’s woeful protagonist is played by a handsome daddy bear, Paul Clemens.

Paul Clemens 01

Paul Clemens 03

Paul Clemens 05

Paul Clemens 09

Paul Clemens 11

Paul Clemens 14

Paul Clemens 17

Paul Clemens 20

Paul Clemens reminds me of another woofy daddy bearish actor: J.T. Walsh.  Check out this trailer compilation for Needful Things (awesome movie and book, by the way) and check out J.T. Walsh’s “I killed my wife…is that wrong?” delivery.  Also, I found this interesting article where Russell’s Crowe character in Body Of Lies was also compared to the late J.T. Walsh: NY Magazine.

Russell Crowe and JT Walsh

Shirtless Saturday: Manuel Martinez

Happy Halloween, guys and ghouls!  Today’s Shirtless Saturday is a very delectable treat for you all.  It’s Manuel Martinez completely naked in the upcoming film, Estigmas.  That’s right.  You’ve heard it right.  Manuel Martinez.  Is.  Not.  Wearing.  Anything.  At.  All…

And as he is truly naked, please click on to see it

Continue reading Shirtless Saturday: Manuel Martinez

Corey Procter: Dallas Cowboys’ Center, Free Reign Drummer, Buffalo Bill Impersonator

Corey Procter as Jim Morrison
In an alternate universe, I would so buy this album...

A few months ago, Pat sent me an email about a metal group composed of four Dallas Cowboys players called “Free Reign” and I’ve been meaning to post about it but just “forgot” about it.  (I’m sorry, Pat!)  Two days ago, Brad sent me a video link to one of the woofy band member being shirtless and reenacting a very memorable/disturbing scene from Silence Of The Lambs.  You just have to see it for yourself…

Point is, I seem tend to focus on any news concerning big guys being shirtless…  😉

Corey Procter

This spectacularly beefy man is Corey Procter (Dallas Cowboys’ Center and Free Reign‘s drummer).  Here’s a video of Corey Proctor and Marc Colombo promoting their debut concert at the Granada Theater:

Free Reign 1

Free Reign 2

Zach Galifianakis & Jack Black Urge You To Save Boobs

Zach & Jack Save The Boobs
My wishful thinking...

Zach Galifianakis and Jack Black are just two of the bearish celebrities who are speaking on behalf of the Noreen Fraser Foundation.  NFF is a charitable organization which raises awareness and funds for women’s cancer research.  In the following two videos, we have those two specializing in their own brand of humor as they urge our female brethren to save their boobies…

[vodpod id=Groupvideo.3546121&w=425&h=350&fv=%26MM_ComponentVersion%3D1%26skinName%3Dhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.noreenfraserfoundation.org%2Fmedia%2FClear_Skin_3%26streamName%3Dhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.noreenfraserfoundation.org%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2FZachG.flv%26autoPlay%3Dfalse%26autoRewind%3Dfalse]
Zach Galifianakis

[vodpod id=Groupvideo.3546113&w=425&h=350&fv=%26MM_ComponentVersion%3D1%26skinName%3Dhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.noreenfraserfoundation.org%2Fmedia%2FClear_Skin_3%26streamName%3Dhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.noreenfraserfoundation.org%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2FJackBlack_v08-PJpeg.flv%26autoPlay%3Dfalse%26autoRewind%3Dfalse]
Jack Black

Shirtless Saturday: David DeLuise

David DeLuise Wizards Of Waverly Place Movie 01

Thanks to John (from my previous David DeLuise post), he pointed us out as to where we could find some shirtless scenes of David DeLuise.  That collage is taken from the Disney Original Movie, Wizards Of Waverly Place: The Movie.  I have never watched the series before, but after watching the film, I have become an instant fan.  Of course, it helps that daddy bear eye candy David DeLuise is in it…  Here are some video clips of his shirtless scene as well as his adorably cute dancing scene…

Now let me go back.  I just called David DeLuise a “daddy bear.”  I am like 1 year younger than him yet for some reason, I have no issues calling him a “daddy bear.”  While researching for further info about him, I stumbled upon this article:

David DeLuise works his magic in ‘Wizards of Waverly Place’
By Rick Bentley | McClatchy Newspapers

At a recent New York autograph signing by the cast of the Disney Channel series “Wizards of Waverly Place,” David DeLuise kept hearing the same thing from young fans: “I wish you were my dad.”

“I tell them that we can write a script and then their dad will act just like me,” says DeLuise in a telephone inter-view. “Of course my real daughter is standing behind me just rolling her eyes.”

What has caught the admiration of so many young fans is DeLuise’s fun-loving and caring portrayal of Jerry Russo, the dad to wizards played by Selena Gomez, David Henrie and Jake T. Austin on the cable series. Maria Canals-Barrera plays their mom, Theresa.

The fans will see a different side of DeLuise’s character in the Disney Channel’s “Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie.”

As the story goes on the series, Jerry gave up his magical abilities when he decided to marry a mortal. A miscast spell turns back the romance clock to the time before Jerry and Theresa met, which means Jerry gets the old magic back.

While the children run around trying to reverse the spell to get back their parents, Jerry gets some use out of his magic.

“It was really fun to have my own wand. It was really cool because it had a handle. I am sure it’ll be in a toy store one day and I’ll have to buy one,” DeLuise says.

He uses the wand a lot because the movie has more than 300 special effects, more than the series.

Another change between the TV show and the movie: The series is shot entirely on a soundstage in front of a stu-dio audience but the two-hour movie was produced during six weeks in Puerto Rico, as if it were a feature film.

The switch from the TV style of shooting to a feature film approach was not that difficult for DeLuise, who has been in the movies “Dracula, Dead and Loving It,” “Kicking and Screaming” and “Robin Hood: Men in Tights.”

DeLuise, 37, began his career at the age of 8 when he played the son to his real father, Dom DeLuise, in the television movie “Happy.” He jokes that he had to audition for the role. Now it is his turn to be the veteran actor surrounded by youngsters.

“We have exceptional kids who are all super funny and super nice,” DeLuise says. “We got lucky. Selena has something you are just born with that is magical.”

(c) 2009, The Fresno Bee (Fresno, Calif.).

[SOURCE: Pantagraph.com]

"How much for that daddy bear in the runway?"

“I wish you were my dad.”

Oddly enough, I have that same wish yet at the same time I want a different type of “dad.”  Again, this brings me to my theory that closeted gay men are basically missing (give or take) 15 years of their actual sexual lives.  Let’s see, I’m currently 36, so subtract 15 and that makes me 21 years old.  Yup, that’s about right.  I should be looking for a partner and not a “daddy figure” but, hey, them’s the breaks.  😉

Alrighty then.  -_^  With that tangent out of the way, here are further handsome photos of Mr. David DeLuise…

wizards_of_waverly_place15

wizards_of_waverly_place20

Joe Davison: Woofy Independent Filmmaker

Joe Davison Beast

Joe Davison shotgunEver since I saw the low-budget film, 100 Tears, on DVD, not only did I become an instant fan of this ultra-gory slashfest, I also instantly fell in love with its writer/star, Joe Davison.  Unlike modern slasher films, this movie does not shy away from the actual “kill moment” nor does it switch to computer trickery either.  You see the incoming kill, you see what actually happens, and you then see its cringe-worthy results.

I really want to see what Joe can do with an actual Hollywood budget and I can only salivate on the what-ifs scenarios.  I then continued to follow his progress in the difficult world of independent filmmaking and I am excited to learn that his new film, Experiment 7, will be released soon (unfortunately, just for the lucky guys and ghouls who can attend the Freak Show Film Fest in Orlando, Florida).

Joe Davison shades

Joe Davison 100 TearsBeing a horror fan who’s slowly losing his interest in the genre, it is passionate artists like Joe Davison who keep hooking me back in.  100 Tears was low-budget and it showed.  However, it made up for down-to-earth acting and realistic gruesome special effects that never once used any digital manipulation.  When I then saw him in Fearmakers, I was a bit disappointed with the film and its special effects as it actually relied on computer special effects which ended up looking really, well, “cheesy.”  Still, it was worth the price of admission for seeing Joe Davison again in his leading-man role.

Being an unabashed Bruce Campbell fanboy, Joe Campbell is definitely up there in regards to horror genre heroes.  As Bruce relies on slapstick humor, thanks to Sam Raimi’s patented campy Looney Tunes-like horror, Joe relies on the subdued type of humor.  When I read on Mr. Davison’s biography, I found out that he used to be a comedian and his skills on that craft really show up in his films.  In 100 Tears, there was a natural flow to the dialogue that I found completely endearing.

Anyway, there are three main reasons why I’m excited to see Experiment 7.  One, is a given, but I’ll say it anyway: Joe Davison is flat-out amazingly handsome (this is also his directorial debut).  Second, he’s playing a snappy-talking, gun-toting badass in an apocalyptic landscape (if I have any favorite type of literary thematic fetishes, that would be it).  Check out the trailer below:

As part of my related ramblings, my Fallout 3 character was named JoeD in honor of Joe Davison.  That then concludes my final reasoning as to why I’m excited to see this flick.

Here are three hilarious instructional videos from Mr. Davison channeling William Shatner on how to kill these “supernaturalalitism” (lol) creatures…


How To Kill A Werewolf


How To Kill A Vampire


How To Kill A Zombie

Joe Davison How To Kill A Vampire 01

Joe Davison How To Kill A Zombie 01

Finally, here are some photos of Joe Davison with his killer right dimple…

Joe Davison 100 Tears 06

Joe Davison dimple 01

Joe Davison dimple 02

Joe Davison dimple 03

Joe Davison dimple 04

Okay, well, apparently, there are more.  Here are some shirtless photos of the ever-woofy Joe Davison…

Joe Davison shirtless 01

Joe Davison shirtless 02

Joe Davison fearmakers 01a
This was a WTF moment in the film "Fearmakers." It's a photo that shows up on his buddy's laptop.

Kim Bodnia: “Old Men In New Cars”

Kim Bodnia ominc-001

Denmark’s Kim Bodnia is up there as one of my favorite bearish actors.  I first discovered him back in 2002 when I was browsing through the foreign DVD section of a Tower Records WOW Superstore.  (You can relive that same story of my mine from my first Kim Bodnia post I did a year ago.)

Kim Bodnia ominc-010

The very first DVD I found was Gamle mænd i nye biler (Old Men In New Cars).  My eyes immediately honed in on the husky bearded photoshopped head in the middle of the photo.

Old Men In New CarsI grabbed it right away and I want you guys to figure out where I stopped reading the DVD’s back cover and immediately made an impulse buy:

In a style that makes Hollywood action movies tame by comparison, this hyperventillating comedy/action flick combines breathtaking action sequences with unsettling black humor, unrepentant misogyny, and plenty of super-violence. When the beefy thug and hardened criminal Harald is released from prison, he quickly “enlists” his two former henchmen Peter and Martin into his new gang. Before he resumes his criminal ways, his dying surrogate father asks him to find his biological son, not seen since a bay. But that baby is now in a maximum security prison and a far-from-cured serial killer. With his posse in place, Harald is ready for that crime spree he’s been dreaming of. Bodies begin to pile up; but when one bank robbery ends with them holding hostage a feisty, suicidal young woman, things go from bad to worse for our lovable villains. Breating new life into the gangster genre, Old Men In New Cars is an exhilarating delight.

That’s right.  “Beefy thug” got me.  It was a gamble as the beefy thug might be a reference to someone else and not that actual beefy hunk on the front cover.  You kids today and your iPhones, you could have accessed IMDb and checked out who “Harald” was to verify that the guy on the cover was indeed Kim Bodnia, aka “beefy thug.”  Anyway, that then led me to exploring most of his movies and I have been a fan ever since.

Kim Bodnia ominc-017

Here are some screenshots of Mr. Bodnia’s shirtless scene in Old Men In New Cars.

As always, please check out the bearmythology Flickr Photostream for more screenshots.

Kim Bodnia ominc 19

Kim Bodnia ominc 16

Kim Bodnia ominc 13

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Kim Bodnia ominc 09

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This is the first 4 minutes of the film


This is the ending of the film and I love it because there’s something
about seeing a big guy cry…

[Related Posts – Kim Bodnia]

Shirtless Saturday: Pruitt Taylor Vince

I first noticed Pruitt Taylor Vince when I rented Heavy back in the mid-’90s.  I remember having an AOL account and I created a whole webpage dedicated to my analysis of that film.  I also remember constantly refreshing my page hoping to see my stat counter explode with visitors, but, alas, I made 327 visits to it (out of 330 total).  I wanted the world to know just how awesome the movie was.

Heavy VHS cover
Whoever made this cover totally missed the whole point of the movie

I remember linking it to the Bears Mailing List and I ended up forcing my film analysis on to an unsuspecting Mr. Les K. Wright (editor of The Bear Book 1 & 2 and founder of The Bear History Project).  I was still new to the world of “bears” and Mr. Wright was very patient with my billions of questions and overeagerness.  He was very kind to my pompous film analysis of Heavy.  (If I could find it, I’d repost it here.)  But my love for that film pretty much equaled my intense attraction toward its chubby lead actor.

Anyway, all that rambling just so we could segue into today’s Shirtless Saturday model: Pruitt Taylor Vince.  I remember giggling like a giddy little girl when I finally saw him shirtless in Captivity.  Thanks to Tumblr’s moviechubs, he made me aware that just a decade and four years ago, PTV already got shirtless.  I still couldn’t believe that I missed it.

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Drop Dead Sexy 10
Mr. Vince, oh wow, that is very, wow, oh my!
Pruitt Taylor Vince - Drop Dead Sexy 17
I think it’s time to take it to the next level…

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Drop Dead Sexy 27

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Drop Dead Sexy 33
Jimmy, is this blondie a swimmer? She’s been down for a whole twenty minutes!

Please check out more screenshots at the bearmythology Flickr Photostream.  And check out Chubarama for more PTV coverage.

And here are also some screenshots from Captivity.

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Captivity

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Captivity 18

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Captivity 19

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Captivity 23

Pruitt Taylor Vince - Captivity 25